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Keywords:

• just fed a duck at the lake

Comment: a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.

Keywords:

• so high he's convinced he's a duck.

Comment: hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.

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• I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle

Comment: trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard

Keywords:

• I'm gonna need you to NOT let me

Comment: play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.

Keywords:

• we bought a duck

Comment: we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.

Keywords:

• I demand visitation hours

Comment: with the duck.

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• I hate ducks.

Comment: they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.

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• She gave me a rubber ducky

Comment: to make me feel better while I was throwing up.

Keywords:

• I think the duck is in my room.

Comment: You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover

Keywords:

• Duck Duck Cougar?

Keywords:

• no more duck duck goose at the bar

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• Thought he put a fake swan in my yard

Comment: but no, he put a real life swan in my yard

Keywords:

• Things are going great.

Comment: I have tons of beer and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.

Keywords:

• She is so graceful and lady-like

Comment: like a swan... On meth

Keywords:

• Drinking mikes hard

Comment: & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college